Loop

see me struggle
to get out of bed
see the chains
weighing me down
hear the thoughts in my head
wishing I were dead
see my sanity hang by a thread
making it feel like I’m dying
see the clouds in my dreams
foretelling the gloom I feel
see my fake smile I give
so you don’t have to worry about me
hear my empty laugh
to convince you I’m alright
see how tired I am
to pretend all the time
hear me try to explain
why I’m not okay
just listen
don’t nag
that only makes me feel worse
don’t make me loop back
giving you the same fake smile
giving you the same fake laugh
because you didn’t understand
and I fear you’ll never understand
see the struggle
see the chains
hear the thoughts
see my sanity hang by a thread
see the clouds in my dreams
see my fake smile
hear my empty laugh
see how tired I am
let me try to explain
don’t belittle
don’t insult
don’t treat me like a
spoiled lazy child
just try to understand
how I feel inside
give me time and space
to come around
and when I do
don’t assume the fight is over
it just means I won today
but I can’t say for tomorrow
this strength doesn’t last forever
this loop is inevitable
I’m bound to feel it again
there’s not much I or you
can do about it
just understand
just let me try to explain
just give me time and space
to come around
see the struggle and understand it
see the chains and try to lift them
hear the thoughts and shield me
help me come around
don’t hate me when I’m down
understand the loop

via Daily Prompt: Loop

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